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How To Overcome Approach Anxiety: The Mihayli Method | Attract Women Report
Before The Approach
handle approach anxiety
How To Overcome Approach Anxiety: The Mihayli Method

Approach anxiety: the enemy of all free men and the enemy of The Game.  All men have it, but few conquer and tame it. 

Approach anxiety is a fear, a phobia, something that cannot be eliminated, but with proper handling and some tweaking of your mindset, can be controlled.

There are many theories and stupid remedies on how to overcome approach anxiety.  Self Hypnosis?  Positive thinking? 100’s and months of cold approaches?  Count to 3 and play question games in your mind?  Psychotherapy?  Voodoo magick? 

Come on… There are no quick fixes nor is there any one proven method to handle this enemy of mankind.  It is tough to acknowledge but there is actually only one way to overcome approach anxiety.  That is to change your frame of thinking and mindset coupled with facing this fear head on.

WHY YOU NEED TO: Get rid of approach anxiety

ANOTHER REASON TO: Overcome approach anxiety


how to get rid of approach anxiety

How To Overcome Approach Anxiety: The Mihayli Method

1) Approach anxiety is an illusion created by YOU.

Beautiful women don’t make you anxious, you make yourself anxious.  Women don’t by themselves emit some gamma ray that makes you feel nauseous, dizzy, stressed, and dumbstruck.  Your inner collection of fears and phobias creates a negative social frame in your mind that when summed up, makes you jello at the thought of approaching a pretty woman.

Additionally, it is something that you create inside yourself when you think about taking on a a task that has specific requirements.

2)  The amount of anxiety you experience doing anything in life is determined by your perception of your skill and the challenge of the activity.

Mihayli Csikszentmihalyi coined the term Flow to describe his scientific investigation of “being in state” or “being in the zone.”  Being in Flow, state, or the zone simply is having the perceived level of skill in an activity equal to the perceived level of challenge. 

When you get this challenge /skill balance, you experience flow /state, whereas an imbalance in challenge and skill results in a different experience.  When skill exceeds challenge, you get bored.  When challenge exceeds skill, you get anxiety.

3) To overcome your approach anxiety, you need to change your perception of skill and/or challenge.

If your perceived skill level matched your perceived challenge level for seducing a woman, you would be in Flow every time you approached a woman.  But if you’re experiencing approach anxiety, it is because your perceived challenge level is higher than your perceived skill. 

So it stands to reason that if you want to overcome approach anxiety, you need to change either the perceived challenge level or your perceived skill level.

4) Trying to change your skill level to overcome approach anxiety is a flawed method.

You would  think that the easiest part to change in this equation is your perceived skill level.  You go out and try to increase you skill level by practicing pickup techniques and pickup lines on girl after girl. 

This is a flawed method to overcome approach anxiety because if you rely on other people’s responses to change your perception of your current skill level then it might work once, twice, or even a few times, but what happens when it doesn’t?  What happens when some girl doesn’t want to talk to you? 

Then you’re right back at square one again – massive approach anxiety because you perceive your skill to be less than the perceived challenge level.


how to overcome approach anxiety

Just have a friendly, interesting chat

5) To overcome approach anxiety, you need to change the perceived challenge.

The challenge level you face in any activity is determined by the purpose you have for the interaction.  If you’re experiencing anxiety then it’s clear you’re trying to do something that pushes the perceived challenge out of your perceived skill range – like trying to make her attracted to you.

MAKE SURE YOU ALSO DON’T MAKE THESE: 3 deadly turn offs for women

However, if you change your purpose to something achievable, then the perceived challenge will drop and so will the anxiety.  If you change your purpose to: “just have an interesting conversation” then the perceived challenge will be well within your perceived skill range.

That’s it! 

All you have to do is change the frame of your mindset from the super stressful “I’m gonna make her attracted to me” to the innocuous “I’m just gonna have a friendly chat with her.”  This puts no expectation on yourself and therefore no fear of rejection because you’re not expecting anything from yourself or the Hot girl.

If you don’t overcome approach anxiety, you’ll never overcome A1 (the opening).  Without A1, you can’t reach A2. Or C1. Or the ever elusive S, right? 

But again, you can read about theory and how-to’s all day long until Sunday but nothing will happen if you don’t go out, apply, and practice!  So get out there and have many friendly, interesting conversations with pretty women…

WHAT THE HECK’S A1, A2, C1, S ??? LEARN: Pickup artist techniques here



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